Marketing Mockery: Welcome to the Dungeon

#AD Let's talk about the "other" side of active. The behind the scenes type of things you don't see or think.This one isn’t in and of itself funny. It leads to a sponsored post on Relentless Forward Commotion, which is addressed perfectly ethically, at least as much as is possible when publishing collides with sponsorship—the author declares it up front, and the blending of sponsor messages and editorial content is minimal, and basically logical. (The connection between Stayfree and Gaiam TV isn’t exactly obvious, I guess, but if they choose to cross-promote, that’s between them and their god.)

And while this blog hasn’t sold out by publishing sponsored posts, that’s due to lack of opportunity rather than anything high-minded. If someone made the right deal, you’d probably hear a cartoon whooshing effect, complete with spinning garbage can lid and spinning chair and spinning other things caused by the wind from me rushing to take it.

So the funny bit: I’m willing to go halfway. Stayfree? Let me promote you. For a modest fee, I will run the Indianapolis Spartan Sprint in May while wearing your product. I’m not even certain what Stayfree is. I know it’s a lady product, which years of stereotypical comedy tells me is inherently hilarious, but being a single male I’ve never made any more thorough investigation. Wait, let me Google…

Absorbent… wicks moisture away from the body… that might actually work.

Stayfree, the ball is in your court.

(Let’s all agree to ignore the slightly unfortunate phrasing of that last sentence, eh?)

Brochure for a BDSM clubHey, a real-world ad! Actually, a brochure. For a BDSM club. Not really funny, I guess, except for the fact that BDSM is something you don’t discuss in polite company, even though it happens a lot more than people would like to admit.

The funny bit comes from location: I found this in the bathroom of one of the posh downtown “vertical malls” on Michigan Avenue. The kind that allows people to bring their dogs, because the only people who do so have the designer toy dogs that they dress up and that are terrible. I’d love to watch the vapors they would have to pretend to have as they storm off upon seeing this brochure, before they come back when they think no one’s watching so they can grab it.

DSW couponLook at that! Real, genuine, personalized birthday wishes from DSW! They really care about me. Well, maybe $5 less than a premier person, but still, that’s a lot of caring. Especially since I only buy some shoes, rather than all the shoes. Really, instead of spending this, I should frame it to remind me of that one time I was loved.

Previous Sunday Mockeries:
Passive Aggressive edition
Let’s Math
The First One



Filed under Funny, Sunday Mockery

3 responses to “Marketing Mockery: Welcome to the Dungeon

  1. Pingback: Marketing Mockery: Twitter Superlative Edition | Fat Boy Big Wall

  2. Pingback: Marketing Mockery: Nothing to Do With Taxes Edition | Fat Boy Big Wall

  3. Pingback: Marketing Mockery: Holy Crap, Deadlines! Version | Fat Boy Big Wall

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